There are many reasons that women and men stay in abusive relationships. Fear of the consequences of leaving (the person becoming more dangerous), concerns about the impact on their children, economic entrapment, and the long term effects of emotional and verbal abuse can make a person second guess their own rational decision making processes.
Other people may question, “Why don’t they just leave?” Friends and family may even question that the person is a victim of abuse because they do not understand the dynamics at play and assume that anyone being so mistreated would leave.
Some lawyers also will make you feel as though you must make the decisions that they want you to make, and they may make you feel as though the decision is not in your hands.
Here is my pledge to the abused woman or man who comes to consult with me:
1. I will protect your confidentiality at all costs and not call your home or follow up with you in ways you know your abuser can access.
2. I will believe you.
3. I will tell you the truth about what lies ahead if you decide to leave.
4. I will respect your decision if you decide to stay, and still be here if you change your mind later.
5. I will do everything in my power to protect your children.
6. I will not judge you.
Here is what I ask of you:
1. If you have decided to leave, and you hire me to help you, help me to help you. It’s easy to shut down in the aftermath of all you have been through, but this is a process that you have to be present for. Our office will do all we can to make it easier for you, but there is work that you must do and decisions that you must make.
2. Have a safety plan in place. Leaving IS the most dangerous time. I can help walk you through what that can mean in your unique situation.
3. Strongly consider counseling with a pastor or professional. You may not even realize how impacted you are and you will need long term support. Consider it also for your children.
4. Come see me before you are ready to go. I can help walk you through the best and safest way to do so.
Like the flower in the picture you can bloom, free of the dark shadows you are currently experiencing. There is only one way out, and that’s through…let us help you through, when you are ready.
For a free consultation call 856-227-7888 or email firstname.lastname@example.org. We have locations in Camden, Burlington, and Gloucester counties, and are happy to discuss your legal options.