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Don’t blame yourself. If you’re a victim of domestic violence, it’s not your fault. Your abuser may try to make you feel differently. Don’t allow it.
Become your own hero. Although it is tempting to look for someone to save you in this time of turmoil, you are the hero you are looking for. Surround yourself with the support you need: a good attorney, friends and family who are supportive. Don’t be afraid to lean on this support, and don’t be afraid to ask questions. But ultimately it is YOU who will get you out of this, and YOU who will look back on this time and know what an amazing, strong person you are for having done it.
Focus on protecting yourself, your family, and your assets. Right now your life feels chaotic; but think of how you will feel a year from now. Try to imagine how you want your life to be then. The things you do now will create that future.
What to discuss with your attorney: 1) creating a plan for your physical safety and that of your children 2) how to file a temporary restraining order 3) what a final restraining order is and how to get one 4) asking for the financial support you need 5) dividing property 6) your children and their support, child custody and visitation 7) what to do if your abuser violates the restraining order 8) finding resources for your emotional support 9) questions you have about the legal process.
The above is not specific legal advice nor does it create a lawyer-client relationship. Do not rely upon it without consulting an attorney to see how the information presented fits your unique circumstances.